Recently, my spouse and I had to say goodbye to our Dumplin’-Butted Fur Kid. The Pieroghi Princess, Lillian “Lily” Bouquet, First of Her Name, Ruler of All Couches Her Eyes Beheld.
We had to make the difficult decision to let her rest after recurrence of cancer had quickly changed her body to the point where it was affecting her mobility and general comfort.
It had only been six months since we had to say goodbye to our sweet buddy, Burghie and while the circumstances of both situations were different, neither were easy nor was one any less painful than the other.
Lily came to us a brief time after we had lost our first cat, Toby. She had originally belonged to my sister-in-law who was moving and was unable to bring four cats to her new place. We were both still raw from the sudden and very unexpected loss of Toby and were unsure if we were ready to bring someone new into our lives, but Lily needed us.
And we quickly realized that we needed her just as much.
Lily was very different than both Toby and Burghie. She was always reserved and less social than either of her brothers. She didn’t so much ask for pets, but rather demanded them as if they were her due and only until she’d had her fill. She was a queen and she knew it.
When we adopted and brought home Burghie from the shelter, we were wondering how she would react. We had decided to bring in a second cat because we didn’t want her to alone all day while we were at work, but we both knew that she was, to put it politely, high-strung AF, so we were seeking a mellow cat to compliment her. Burghie was a cat that could be classified as a liquid.
As the pair sussed each other out, it quickly became clear what their relationship would be. He was her big, dumb kitten and thus he remained for the next 8 years. She was content to let him be the hyper affectionate, social one and only after he vetted any humans who entered her domain, would she deign in fit to grace them with her presence, if only to let them know whose realm they had entered.
When Burghie left us, she did what every good monarch does – She did right by her people. She left her throne room and spent more time with us, as if she knew that was what we needed more than anything else in that moment.
And we likewise did our best to do right by her, even when it hurt so damn much.
That’s the deal between humans and cats. We do our damnedest to do right by them, because what they give us back is immeasurable.
And when we must inevitably say goodbye, the pain is likewise immeasurable, but it’s also worth it. Every memory you build is worth that pain because, while that pain never goes away completely, it will fade and eventually it even becomes infused with the joy their memory brings to your life.
We are, in the end, just moments on this spinning rock hurtling through space. Lily was a good one and I’m forever grateful that I was able to experience it. I was her Cat Dad and I wouldn’t trade that for anything.
Right now, for the first time in 11 years, there are no cats within the walls of our home. It’s a strange, surreal feeling for certain. What’s also for certain, however, is that will not be the case forever. One day in the future we will bring another fuzzy soul or perhaps a pair of them into our family. We will take tremendous joy in their presence while still remembering the joy their spiritual siblings had brought us.
I look forward to that day.
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